Once more with feeling
Aaaaaaaand again !
Around 15 blogs, some born dead, some for a month or two, some for 6 months to a year, this one is the very oldest. Created the day after a very bad premonitory dream, about five years and a half ago, it's still here; not quite sure I said I quitted but I sure did, a couple times for almost a year, I suppose. Also thought this blog was lost and gone for about 6 months once, before I realised google at it all backed up^^
I guess I feel like writing again.
Life goes on, and for somebody who listens and watches as much as I do it's already an interesting fact. Things change, things stay the same, both are meaningful, even though I have my favourite one. Experience is a double-edged sword. It is nice to know things, some mysteries become clear, some problems solved, some errors avoided. But wisdom comes along with the realisation that wisdom won't change a thing. It won't change life.
Because that's what you've been trying to do when you were young, change life. But life isn't something you change, it's not even quite a thing at all. Life needs you as much as you need life; life is made of you, but it will carry on whatever you do and whatever will happen to you.
Most of the time I don't try so hard anymore. I've realized how foolish it is to try, sometimes. And things aren't going all bad, got it fairly easy settling down here in San Francisco, got a well paid, not too demanding, and sometimes fun job, a welcoming house with tons happening in and out, possibilities for the future.
I already feel proud when I look back on the previous chapters of my life, and I already know I'll make more happen. After all maybe happiness is the only thing that could slow me down : who knows if I wouldn't become a fat contented cat if I got it. Other than this I'm an adventurer, soldier of a war that is mostly inside my head.
Most of the fighting, most of the victories and defeats, most of the sweat, blood and tears, and most of the scars are invisible to the common human eye, but I'm happy with them for they are making me. There are many more battles to come, many thoughts, many challenges, many questions, many discoveries.
That's what my life is.
Around 15 blogs, some born dead, some for a month or two, some for 6 months to a year, this one is the very oldest. Created the day after a very bad premonitory dream, about five years and a half ago, it's still here; not quite sure I said I quitted but I sure did, a couple times for almost a year, I suppose. Also thought this blog was lost and gone for about 6 months once, before I realised google at it all backed up^^
I guess I feel like writing again.
Life goes on, and for somebody who listens and watches as much as I do it's already an interesting fact. Things change, things stay the same, both are meaningful, even though I have my favourite one. Experience is a double-edged sword. It is nice to know things, some mysteries become clear, some problems solved, some errors avoided. But wisdom comes along with the realisation that wisdom won't change a thing. It won't change life.
Because that's what you've been trying to do when you were young, change life. But life isn't something you change, it's not even quite a thing at all. Life needs you as much as you need life; life is made of you, but it will carry on whatever you do and whatever will happen to you.
Most of the time I don't try so hard anymore. I've realized how foolish it is to try, sometimes. And things aren't going all bad, got it fairly easy settling down here in San Francisco, got a well paid, not too demanding, and sometimes fun job, a welcoming house with tons happening in and out, possibilities for the future.
I already feel proud when I look back on the previous chapters of my life, and I already know I'll make more happen. After all maybe happiness is the only thing that could slow me down : who knows if I wouldn't become a fat contented cat if I got it. Other than this I'm an adventurer, soldier of a war that is mostly inside my head.
Most of the fighting, most of the victories and defeats, most of the sweat, blood and tears, and most of the scars are invisible to the common human eye, but I'm happy with them for they are making me. There are many more battles to come, many thoughts, many challenges, many questions, many discoveries.
That's what my life is.
posté par BanZZ à 09:43
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